You've probably tried the usual confidence hacks: power posing before a meeting, repeating affirmations in the mirror, or pushing yourself to "just do it" despite the knot in your stomach. And while these tactics might give you a temporary boost, they rarely create lasting change. Why? Because they treat confidence as something you do rather than something you are.

You're in a meeting. You have a brilliant idea brewing, a solution that could genuinely help, or a perspective that might shift the entire conversation. But as you open your mouth to speak, someone else jumps in. The moment passes. You tell yourself you'll speak up next time, but next time feels just as daunting.

As we stand at the threshold of a new year, there's a familiar ritual that plays out across the world. Gym memberships spike, journals are cracked open, and ambitious lists of resolutions are scribbled down with the best of intentions. Yet by February, most of these well-meaning promises have quietly faded into the background of our busy lives.

Christmas is often painted as the happiest time of the year, full of joy, connection, and celebration. But for many people, it can also bring pressure, comparison, loneliness, and stress. Expectations rise, routines change, and emotions can feel more intense.

Confidence is often misunderstood. Many people believe it’s about being louder, more outgoing, or more impressive than others. But real, lasting confidence doesn’t start with how you act — it starts with how you treat yourself.

Fear of judgment is one of the biggest confidence killers and most people don’t even realise how much it controls their decisions.

We often think of confidence as the ability to walk into a room and command attention, to speak without hesitation, or to tackle challenges head-on. Whilst these are certainly expressions of confidence, they're not its foundation. The deepest, most unshakeable form of confidence doesn't come from external validation or fleeting moments of success. It comes from something far more enduring: self-respect.

I often hear from people who say; “I’m just not a confident person.” It’s a common belief. I used to say and believe it myself until I learnt that it was just a belief not the truth or a fact.Many treat confidence as though it’s something you're born with, a fixed personality characteristic. But what if confidence isn’t a trait at all, what if it’s a skill you can learn and strengthen over time?

You've just delivered what you thought was a solid presentation. Your slides were polished, your delivery was smooth, and you were feeling confident. Then someone raises their hand and asks a question that makes your mind go blank. Your heart races, your palms sweat, and suddenly that hard-won confidence evaporates.

Confidence isn't something you're simply born with, it's a skill you can develop, nurture, and strengthen over time. One of the most powerful yet underutilized tools for building lasting confidence is the practice of daily affirmations. These simple, positive statements might seem too easy to be effective, but science and countless personal success stories prove otherwise.

This blog follows another one, I wrote recently about the importance of self-advocacy at work.  It such an important topic as let's be honest: if you're reading this, the phrase "self-promotion" probably makes you cringe. You're not alone. Many of us were raised to believe that good work speaks for itself, that tooting your own horn is arrogant, and that if we just keep our heads down and do excellent work, someone will eventually notice.

We've all been there. Standing at the edge of something that feels impossibly difficult, our minds racing with worst-case scenarios, our confidence evaporating like morning mist. Whether it's a presentation at work, a difficult conversation, or stepping into an unfamiliar social situation, challenging moments have a way of making us forget everything we know about ourselves.